Thread: the Official CHR joke page duel

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Who's in favour of bringing back Roman numerals?

I for one.

Who's in favour of bringing back Roman numerals?

I for one.

A minute apart.. I for one!

That's III

A bushman saw a peculiar growth on a tree and asked his friend what it was.

His mate said "I don't know; but I've seen it on three other trees. This must be IV."

"It's four in the morning" This is V

It was a small town and the patrolman was making his evening rounds.

As he was checking a used car lot, he came upon two little old ladies sitting in a used car.

He stopped and asked them why they were sitting there in the car. Were they trying to steal it?

"Heavens no, we bought it."

"Then why don't you drive it away."

"We can't drive."

"Then why did you buy it?"

"We were told that if we bought a used car here we'd get screwed .... so we're just waiting.

If that isn't s-x, I don't know what is. VI

When I was young, I decided I wanted to be a doctor so I took the entrance exam to go to Medical School.

One of the questions asked us to rearrange the letters PNEIS into the name of an important human body part which is most useful when erect.

Those who answered spine are doctors today. The rest of us are sending jokes via email.

Years ago l told all my friends l was going to do stand up comedy and they all laughed!

Now they don't

Technical computer terms for farmers.

Log on: when you want to make the house warmer.

Log off: Timberrrrrrr!

Mega Hertz: when you are not careful getting the firewood.

Lap top: where the cat sleeps.

Byte: what mosquitos do.

Modem: what I did to the hay fields.

Keyboard: where the keys hang.

Mouse: little critters that eat the grain in the shed.

A gentleman is preparing to board a plane, when he hears that the Pope is on the same flight. “This is exciting,” thinks the gentleman.
“Perhaps I'll be able to see him in person.”
Imagine his surprise when the Pope sits down in the seat next to him.
Shortly after take-off, the Pope begins a crossword puzzle.
Almost immediately, the Pope turns to the gentleman and says, “Excuse me, but do you know a four letter word referring to a woman that ends in ‘unt?’”
Only one word leaps to mind. “My goodness,” thinks the gentleman, “I can't tell the Pope that. There must be another word.”
The gentleman thinks for quite a while, and then it hits him.
Turning to the Pope, the gentleman says, “I think the word you're looking for is ‘aunt.’”
“Of course,” says the Pope.
“Do you have an eraser?”

RACECAR backwards is still RACECAR!
-
RACECAR upside down is EXPENSIVE!!

Originally Posted by rspears

RACECAR backwards is still RACECAR!
-
RACECAR upside down is EXPENSIVE!!

But swims is still the same upside down.

Originally Posted by johnboy

But swims is still the same upside down.

Upside down & backwards! Just upside down it's SMIWS!

Upside down RACECAR is EXPENSIVE no matter which way you turn it!!