5809LikesThread: the Official CHR joke page duel
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12-10-2024 06:58 PM #1
CHR Member
- Join Date
- May 2005
- Location
- Tataraimaka NZ
- Car Year, Make, Model: `47 Ford sedan, A.C.Cobra replica.
- Posts
- 2,895
What Christmas present just can't be beat?
A broken drum.
.johnboy
Mountain man. (Retired.)
Some mistakes are too much fun to be made only once.
I don't know everything about anything, and I don't know anything about lots of things.
'47 Ford sedan. 350 -- 350, Jaguar irs + ifs.
'49 Morris Minor. Datsun 1500cc, 5sp manual, Marina front axle, Nissan rear axle.
'51 Ford school bus. Chev 400 ci Vortec 5 sp manual + Gearvendors 2sp, 2000 Chev lwb dually chassis and axles.
'64 A.C. Cobra replica. Ford 429, C6 auto, Torana ifs, Jaguar irs.
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12-10-2024 08:31 PM #2
CHR Member
- Join Date
- Oct 2007
- Location
- Petaluma
- Car Year, Make, Model: 48 Ford F1
- Posts
- 9,795
++++++ Awesome" 
"No matter where you go, there you are!" Steve.
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12-11-2024 08:04 PM #3
CHR Member
- Join Date
- May 2005
- Location
- Tataraimaka NZ
- Car Year, Make, Model: `47 Ford sedan, A.C.Cobra replica.
- Posts
- 2,895
What did one Christmas tree say to another?
"Brighten up!"
.johnboy
Mountain man. (Retired.)
Some mistakes are too much fun to be made only once.
I don't know everything about anything, and I don't know anything about lots of things.
'47 Ford sedan. 350 -- 350, Jaguar irs + ifs.
'49 Morris Minor. Datsun 1500cc, 5sp manual, Marina front axle, Nissan rear axle.
'51 Ford school bus. Chev 400 ci Vortec 5 sp manual + Gearvendors 2sp, 2000 Chev lwb dually chassis and axles.
'64 A.C. Cobra replica. Ford 429, C6 auto, Torana ifs, Jaguar irs.
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12-12-2024 06:03 AM #4
CHR Member/Contributor
- Join Date
- Sep 2007
- Location
- Gardner, KS
- Car Year, Make, Model: '33 HiBoy Coupe, '32 HiBoy Roadster
- Posts
- 11,245
Seen on FB...Roger
Enjoy the little things in life, and you may look back one day and realize that they were really the BIG things.
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12-13-2024 08:02 PM #5
CHR Member
- Join Date
- May 2005
- Location
- Tataraimaka NZ
- Car Year, Make, Model: `47 Ford sedan, A.C.Cobra replica.
- Posts
- 2,895
My mother-in-law asked for something she could utilise in her bath for her Christmas present.
So I bought her an electric toaster.
.johnboy
Mountain man. (Retired.)
Some mistakes are too much fun to be made only once.
I don't know everything about anything, and I don't know anything about lots of things.
'47 Ford sedan. 350 -- 350, Jaguar irs + ifs.
'49 Morris Minor. Datsun 1500cc, 5sp manual, Marina front axle, Nissan rear axle.
'51 Ford school bus. Chev 400 ci Vortec 5 sp manual + Gearvendors 2sp, 2000 Chev lwb dually chassis and axles.
'64 A.C. Cobra replica. Ford 429, C6 auto, Torana ifs, Jaguar irs.
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12-14-2024 07:01 PM #6
CHR Member
- Join Date
- May 2005
- Location
- Tataraimaka NZ
- Car Year, Make, Model: `47 Ford sedan, A.C.Cobra replica.
- Posts
- 2,895
What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?
A Holly Davidson.
.johnboy
Mountain man. (Retired.)
Some mistakes are too much fun to be made only once.
I don't know everything about anything, and I don't know anything about lots of things.
'47 Ford sedan. 350 -- 350, Jaguar irs + ifs.
'49 Morris Minor. Datsun 1500cc, 5sp manual, Marina front axle, Nissan rear axle.
'51 Ford school bus. Chev 400 ci Vortec 5 sp manual + Gearvendors 2sp, 2000 Chev lwb dually chassis and axles.
'64 A.C. Cobra replica. Ford 429, C6 auto, Torana ifs, Jaguar irs.
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12-15-2024 07:12 PM #7
CHR Member
- Join Date
- May 2005
- Location
- Tataraimaka NZ
- Car Year, Make, Model: `47 Ford sedan, A.C.Cobra replica.
- Posts
- 2,895
What do Christmas trees and old men have in common?
The wood is dead and the balls are just for decoration.
.johnboy
Mountain man. (Retired.)
Some mistakes are too much fun to be made only once.
I don't know everything about anything, and I don't know anything about lots of things.
'47 Ford sedan. 350 -- 350, Jaguar irs + ifs.
'49 Morris Minor. Datsun 1500cc, 5sp manual, Marina front axle, Nissan rear axle.
'51 Ford school bus. Chev 400 ci Vortec 5 sp manual + Gearvendors 2sp, 2000 Chev lwb dually chassis and axles.
'64 A.C. Cobra replica. Ford 429, C6 auto, Torana ifs, Jaguar irs.
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12-15-2024 07:06 PM #8
CHR Member
- Join Date
- May 2005
- Location
- Tataraimaka NZ
- Car Year, Make, Model: `47 Ford sedan, A.C.Cobra replica.
- Posts
- 2,895
How do you know that all Christmas trees are old?
They all need candy canes.
.johnboy
Mountain man. (Retired.)
Some mistakes are too much fun to be made only once.
I don't know everything about anything, and I don't know anything about lots of things.
'47 Ford sedan. 350 -- 350, Jaguar irs + ifs.
'49 Morris Minor. Datsun 1500cc, 5sp manual, Marina front axle, Nissan rear axle.
'51 Ford school bus. Chev 400 ci Vortec 5 sp manual + Gearvendors 2sp, 2000 Chev lwb dually chassis and axles.
'64 A.C. Cobra replica. Ford 429, C6 auto, Torana ifs, Jaguar irs.
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12-16-2024 06:41 PM #9
CHR Member
- Join Date
- May 2005
- Location
- Tataraimaka NZ
- Car Year, Make, Model: `47 Ford sedan, A.C.Cobra replica.
- Posts
- 2,895
After twenty years of marriage Louise was upset her husband Tom never bought her a Christmas gift.
She was so upset she told him she wanted to see a Marriage Counselor.
The Counselor asked Tom why he never bought Louise a Christmas gift.
"I did! I bought her a gift the first year we were married!" he said.
"Well why have you never given her once since?" the Counselor asked.
I told her I'd get her another one when she'd utilised the first one I got her. She hasn't used it since." he said.
The Counselor looked at Louise who was staring at the floor.
What did you get her?" the Counselor asked.
"A cemetery plot."
.johnboy
Mountain man. (Retired.)
Some mistakes are too much fun to be made only once.
I don't know everything about anything, and I don't know anything about lots of things.
'47 Ford sedan. 350 -- 350, Jaguar irs + ifs.
'49 Morris Minor. Datsun 1500cc, 5sp manual, Marina front axle, Nissan rear axle.
'51 Ford school bus. Chev 400 ci Vortec 5 sp manual + Gearvendors 2sp, 2000 Chev lwb dually chassis and axles.
'64 A.C. Cobra replica. Ford 429, C6 auto, Torana ifs, Jaguar irs.
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12-17-2024 07:04 PM #10
CHR Member
- Join Date
- May 2005
- Location
- Tataraimaka NZ
- Car Year, Make, Model: `47 Ford sedan, A.C.Cobra replica.
- Posts
- 2,895
Why does Santa go down the chimney?
Because it soots him.
What's it called when you have a fear of getting stuck in a chimney?
Santa Claustrophobia.
.johnboy
Mountain man. (Retired.)
Some mistakes are too much fun to be made only once.
I don't know everything about anything, and I don't know anything about lots of things.
'47 Ford sedan. 350 -- 350, Jaguar irs + ifs.
'49 Morris Minor. Datsun 1500cc, 5sp manual, Marina front axle, Nissan rear axle.
'51 Ford school bus. Chev 400 ci Vortec 5 sp manual + Gearvendors 2sp, 2000 Chev lwb dually chassis and axles.
'64 A.C. Cobra replica. Ford 429, C6 auto, Torana ifs, Jaguar irs.
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12-19-2024 07:08 PM #11
CHR Member
- Join Date
- May 2005
- Location
- Tataraimaka NZ
- Car Year, Make, Model: `47 Ford sedan, A.C.Cobra replica.
- Posts
- 2,895
Where would you find a snowman dancing at Christmas?
At a snow ball.
.johnboy
Mountain man. (Retired.)
Some mistakes are too much fun to be made only once.
I don't know everything about anything, and I don't know anything about lots of things.
'47 Ford sedan. 350 -- 350, Jaguar irs + ifs.
'49 Morris Minor. Datsun 1500cc, 5sp manual, Marina front axle, Nissan rear axle.
'51 Ford school bus. Chev 400 ci Vortec 5 sp manual + Gearvendors 2sp, 2000 Chev lwb dually chassis and axles.
'64 A.C. Cobra replica. Ford 429, C6 auto, Torana ifs, Jaguar irs.
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12-20-2024 07:16 PM #12
CHR Member
- Join Date
- May 2005
- Location
- Tataraimaka NZ
- Car Year, Make, Model: `47 Ford sedan, A.C.Cobra replica.
- Posts
- 2,895
How much did Santa have to pay for his sleigh?
Nothing! It's on the house!
.johnboy
Mountain man. (Retired.)
Some mistakes are too much fun to be made only once.
I don't know everything about anything, and I don't know anything about lots of things.
'47 Ford sedan. 350 -- 350, Jaguar irs + ifs.
'49 Morris Minor. Datsun 1500cc, 5sp manual, Marina front axle, Nissan rear axle.
'51 Ford school bus. Chev 400 ci Vortec 5 sp manual + Gearvendors 2sp, 2000 Chev lwb dually chassis and axles.
'64 A.C. Cobra replica. Ford 429, C6 auto, Torana ifs, Jaguar irs.
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12-20-2024 06:36 PM #13
CHR Member
- Join Date
- May 2005
- Location
- Tataraimaka NZ
- Car Year, Make, Model: `47 Ford sedan, A.C.Cobra replica.
- Posts
- 2,895
The police came around last night and told me my dogs were chasing people on bikes.
My dogs don't even have bikes!
.johnboy
Mountain man. (Retired.)
Some mistakes are too much fun to be made only once.
I don't know everything about anything, and I don't know anything about lots of things.
'47 Ford sedan. 350 -- 350, Jaguar irs + ifs.
'49 Morris Minor. Datsun 1500cc, 5sp manual, Marina front axle, Nissan rear axle.
'51 Ford school bus. Chev 400 ci Vortec 5 sp manual + Gearvendors 2sp, 2000 Chev lwb dually chassis and axles.
'64 A.C. Cobra replica. Ford 429, C6 auto, Torana ifs, Jaguar irs.
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12-23-2024 08:06 PM #14
CHR Member
- Join Date
- May 2005
- Location
- Tataraimaka NZ
- Car Year, Make, Model: `47 Ford sedan, A.C.Cobra replica.
- Posts
- 2,895
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Santa.
Santa who?
Santa Christmas card to you!
.
Knock knock!
Who's there?
Anna.
Anna who?
Anna partridge in a pear tree!
'That's all folks!'
jb.
.Last edited by johnboy; 12-23-2024 at 08:08 PM.
johnboy
Mountain man. (Retired.)
Some mistakes are too much fun to be made only once.
I don't know everything about anything, and I don't know anything about lots of things.
'47 Ford sedan. 350 -- 350, Jaguar irs + ifs.
'49 Morris Minor. Datsun 1500cc, 5sp manual, Marina front axle, Nissan rear axle.
'51 Ford school bus. Chev 400 ci Vortec 5 sp manual + Gearvendors 2sp, 2000 Chev lwb dually chassis and axles.
'64 A.C. Cobra replica. Ford 429, C6 auto, Torana ifs, Jaguar irs.
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01-08-2025 09:42 AM #15
CHR Member/Contributor
- Join Date
- Feb 2004
- Location
- Bella Coola
- Car Year, Make, Model: 1948 Thames E83W- and many others
- Posts
- 810
Little Johnny wanted to go to the zoo and pestered his parents for days. Finally, his mother talked his reluctant father into taking him. After several hours, the two men of the family come back, smiling and tired. "So how was it?" his mother asked when they returned home. "Great," Little Johnny replied. "Did you and your father have a good time?" asked his mother. "Yeah, Daddy especially liked it," exclaimed Little Johnny excitedly, "especially when one of the animals came home at 30 to 1 !"
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Yep. It’s pretty sad.
Dead!