The Box Under Bill & Hillary's Bed
When Bill and Hillary first got married Bill said, "I
am putting a box under the bed. You must promise never
to look in it"
In all their 30 years of marriage, Hillary never
looked. On the afternoon of their 30th anniversary,
curiosity got the best of her and she lifted the lid
and peeked inside. In the box was 3 empty beer cans
and $81,874.25 in cash.
She closed the box and put it back under the bed. Now
that she knew what was in the box, she was doubly
curious as to why there even was such a box with such
contents. That evening, they were out for a special
anniversary dinner.
After dinner, Hillary could no longer contain her
curiosity and she confessed, saying, "I am so sorry,
Bill. For all these years, I kept my promise and never
looked into the box under our bed. However, today the
temptation was too much and I gave in. But now I need
to know, why do you keep the 3 beer cans in the box?"
Bill thought for a while and said, "I guess after all
these years you deserve to know the truth. Whenever I
was unfaithful to you, I put an empty beer can in the
box under the bed to remind myself not to do it
again."
Hillary was shocked, but said, "Hmmm, Jennifer, Paula
and Monica. I am very disappointed and saddened by
your behavior. However, since you are addicted to sex
I guess it does happen and I guess 3 times is not that
bad considering your problem."
Bill thanked her for being so understanding. They
hugged and made their peace. A little while later
Hillary asked Bill, "So why do you have all that money
in the box?"
Bill answered: "Well, whenever the box filled up with
empty cans, I took them to the recycling center and
redeemed them for cash.":o :o
Sometimes it pays to be old
No one believes seniors . . . everyone thinks they are senile.
An Elderly couple was celebrating their sixtieth anniversary. The couple had married as childhood sweethearts and had moved back to their old neighborhood after they retired.
Holding hands they walked back to their old school. It was not locked, so they entered, and found the old desk they'd shared, where Andy had carved "I love you, Sally."
On their way back home, a bag of money fell out of an armored car, practically landing at their feet. Sally quickly picked it up, but not sure what to do with it, they took it home. There, she counted the money--fifty-thousand dollars.
Andy said, "We've got to give it back."
Sally said, "Finders keepers." She put the money back in the bag and hid it in their attic.
The next day, two police officers were canvassing the neighborhood looking for the money, and knocked on the door.
"Pardon me, but did either of you find a bag that fell out of an armored car yesterday?"
Sally said, "No."
Andy said, "She's lying. She hid it up in the attic."
Sally said, "Don't believe him, he's getting senile."
The Mounties turn to Andy and began to question him.
One says: "Tell us the story from the beginning"
Andy said, "Well, when Sally and I were walking home from school yesterday . . "
The first cop turns to his partner and says, "We're outta here."