It started out just like every other night..... I turned in early as the Wife was working in Seattle and not to much to do
or places to go.
I usually end up with at least two of our Great Danes crawling up onto the the King size bed to make sure no one surprises me in my sleep.
About three in the morning I'm half wakened by a sound like a bird on the roof right over my head.
The friggin' dogs just go ballistic. All I can hear is loud barking and teeth snapping and this flapping sound in the bedroom.
It kinda looked like a bird had gotten in the house somehow.
I got up and went for the bedroom door with this thing wizzing around my head amidst barking, jumping and snapping.
I was almost afraid I was going to get bitten instead. The dogs were pretty intent in taking down something.

Well, long story short, I got them locked in the guest room and went back and reached in and flicked on the light.
Here it was.....flap flap flap......around the room, a friggin' BAT!!!
I don't really know how big these things are suppose to get but this one was about the size of a robin.

I'm still half a sleep and I go into the guest room and open my desk drawer and get my .45 and then back to the bedroom.......wait!!! You dumb twit.....You're going to shoot a bat with a .45.
I put the gun away and go back with a towel I've soaked to make it heavier.

So...there I am in my shorts swatting at this thing as it makes it's passes. I had thought about just opening the window but they have screens covering them and now I'm trying to figure out how the thing got in.

Bats gotta die!
On one pass near my head I connected with the towel and the bat went sprawling thought the air, hit the wall and slid down behind this really heavy dresser.
I could hear him fluttering on the floor trying to get airborne again.

Now, I don't know why I did it but I grab this Dyson upright vacuum from the closet and extend the wand.
Now, I think, all I have to do is to suck him up to the nozzle so he can't move and I'll wrap him in a towel and take him outside and set him free.

I turn on the vacuum and extend the wand down behind the dresser, the dogs are still going ballistic in the next room.....
"Thunk", I've got him trapped on the nozzle. I pull him up and grab the wet towel in order to get a hold of him.
About that time, "Thunk", the bat disappears and then, "thud", hits the vacuums catcher which is clear.
I look to see if I can see anything of the bat inside......."oh Yeah".....this red stain starts to appear in the inside clear plastic wall and spreads.......Hummm....I guess the commercials are right, it's pretty hard to plug a Dyson.

fast forward..................>>>>>>>

So, here I am in my shorts in front of the garage at three in the morning dumping the contents of the canister and washing the inside wall out after spraying the inside with Windex. The dogs are still barking and I guess I'm not going to get any more sleep.

It's 8:30 now and the friggin' dawgs are finally down for the count.