Voted the best Australian Joke

A bloke's wife goes missing while diving off the West Australian coast.
He reports the event, searches fruitlessly and spends a terrible night wondering what could have happened to her.
Next morning there is a knock at the door and he is confronted by a couple of police officers, the old Sarge and a younger Constable...
The Sarge says, 'Mate, we have some news for you, unfortunately some really bad news, but, some good news, and maybe some more good news'.
'Well,' says the bloke, 'I guess I'd better have the bad news first?'
The Sarge says, 'I'm really sorry mate, but your wife is dead. Young Bill here found her lying at about five fathoms in a little cleft in the reef. He got a line around her and we pulled her up, but she was dead.'
The bloke is naturally pretty distressed to hear of this and has a bit of a turn. However, after a few minutes he pulls himself together and asks what the good news is.
The Sarge says, 'Well when we got your wife up there were quite a few really good sized crays and a swag of nice crabs attached to her, so we've brought you your share.'
He hands the bloke a sugar bag with a couple of nice crays and four or five crabs in it.
'Geez thanks. They're bloody beauties. I guess it is an ill wind and all that... So what's the other possible good news?'
'Well', the Sarge says, 'if you fancy a quick trip, me and young Bill here get off duty at around 11 o'clock and we're gonna shoot over there and pull her up again!'



:D

Gee that's an oldie, I thought they'd a got all those crayfish by now :D

HE! HE! HE! I am not sure about that over here, It takes us a little longer to get your jokes over here!!!
Besides I think you maybe talking about his first wife, I think this maybe his second wife now.
HE! HE! HE!
Kurt

Ya know Echnidna;
HE! HE! HE! I thought this joke might have been in bad taste, but I figured I would send it out anyway.
That’s just in case any fisherman here wanted to know what they use for fishing bait there in Australia.
Hey I'm just wondering Echnidna, How many times can you use the same bait???
Kurt

That could easily pass for a Cajun Joke, Kurt !

Kurt,that depends on the bait...:D I,too,heard that one a year or two back..There are so many good jokes down here that drift front one side of the ditch[Tasman Sea]to the other..We could almost start an Aussie/Kiwi joke page...:DIt would probably end up as a sheep sharing[shearing]:D free for all though..:D.:LOL::LOL:

There is another black joke to rival that one...

A young station hand calls in to his boss one day,while he is out the other side of the cattle station,[40000acres]and says...Boss,I just run over a pig,and its squealin its stupid bloody head off,,what should I do??The boss picks up the R/T and says,you know what to do..grab the .303 off the rack in the back of the cab of the Landcruiser,and put a bullet through his head...what are ya?dumb??:mad:A few minutes later,the radio crackles again,and the farm hand says...Yeah..done that,boss,,but I need a bit of help still...I cant get his damn motor bike out from under the bullbars......:eek::eek::LOL:

Now see I don't get that one, lamin8er.
I am taking it that the pig was some kind of motor cycle ridder,Right!!!
Kurt

here in the South USA it was some Kaintuck hillbillys that saw their first motorcycle rider and the punch line was "Did you get'em Pa - - - Nope but I made him turn loose of that Feller in the leather jacket"

Quote:

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Originally Posted by vara4

Now see I don't get that one, lamin8er.
I am taking it that the pig was some kind of motor cycle ridder,Right!!!
Kurt

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I'd say that in Australia, as in the US "Pig" may be a derogatory term for an officer of the law.....

pigs is slang for cops

Oh my goodness!!!!